Motherhood

25 Things Toddlers Do That Are Socially Unacceptable in Adult Life

Toddlers have a mind of their own.

Seriously though, they say and do the most inappropriate things sometimes.

Just the other day, I’m walking through HEB with my two little girls, shopping as quickly as I can before they have a meltdown, and my three year old leans into me and says, “I think somebody farted.”

Those who heard her look at me…aaannnndd, it gets awkward. But you can always tell who can relate. Because they’re usually giggling at the words that left your toddler’s mouth.

And sometimes these awkward moments don’t even happen in public.

Like when you have company over and your toddler comes running around the corner, naked as the day they were born, hands flailing in the air, and yelling “I’m freeeeeeee.”

And the laughter ensues.

Followed by wise words from mama about why this behavior is inappropriate.

But the best thing about toddler-awkward moments is that they don’t follow you into adult life. Because if adults did half the things on this list, I’m pretty sure we would be lepers to society.

  1. Nose picking ANYWHERE
    Really…anywhere.
  2. Announcing loudly that they have to poop
  3. Telling everyone they farted
    Or pointing out when someone else did.
  4. Yelling in the grocery store
  5. Tantrums
    Full blown melt-downs.
  6. Telling someone that they smell
  7. Begging for things they want
  8. Not paying attention during a conversation

    Because of cell phones and social media, this (sadly) happens in adult life..

  9. Walking away in the middle of a conversation
  10. Taking only one bite out of all of the apples
  11. Making up stories to sound cool(er)
  12. Tattle tale to the boss
    Or mom and dad.
  13. Make a mess of whatever has just been cleaned
    This seems to be a favorite in my household.
  14. Sleep with odd items (toys, stuffed animals, blocks, etc..)
  15. Walk in on “mommy & daddy time.”
    It’s like they know when it’s happening.
  16. Singing the same line from a song on repeat
  17. Hanging out with mom while she’s on the toilet
  18. Replying “I know” to compliments
    “You’re so pretty/handsome.”
    “I know.”
  19. Eating utensil required foods with their hands
    Like spaghetti, or even worse…yogurt.
  20. Blaming others for their mess
  21. Interrupting adult conversations
    Mama, mama, mom, mom, mom…you know the sound.
  22. Bossing friends around
  23. Undressing in public
  24. Asking awkward questions
  25. Telling strangers embarrassing things about mom
    And mom feeling the sting of betrayal, but can’t help but love them more.

Has your toddler done any of these?

Is there anything you might add? I’d love to hear your funny toddler-awkward moments in the comments!

-Taylor Greenwald

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